Each and every day brings forth not only the same challenges but also new challenges. This old world isn't easy. Sometimes it's a task just to get out of bed in the mornings and go on with your day with what feels like the weight of the world on your shoulders. A friend of mine was talking about how vacant respect is in the world today and I fully agree. It's so hard to be the kind of person who would bend over backwards for someone else when it's so obvious they wouldn't do the same. Why have things gotten this way? Have people gotten so busy that they forget they aren't the only ones on the planet?
It's apparent we live in a selfish society as we see the number of divorces continue to go up. Unfortunately for my family, I am one of the numbers. No one puts forth 100% in marriages anymore. It is assumed it is easy, yet if you have the unrealistic idea that marriage is always wonderful, you are sadly mistaken. Marriage is a job and it takes both people working to make it work. When it becomes one working while the other is taking and giving nothing in return, failure sets in and the marriage is doomed. Those that have experienced divorce know that while it gets easier over time, you will always have it looming over your head. You can accept it and move on, but you will always have that sense of failure, the fear that it will happen again. This is one of those challenges that I mentioned. Taking each day as a new day and staying positive isn't easy. Divorce can leave you with self doubt, fear, resentment, etc. and overcoming that, trying to move on and start a new relationship is scary. You don't want it to fail in the same way so that can cause you to hold back, to not give the 100% necessary for that relationship to thrive and grow but how do you overcome that? How do you leave your baggage behind and be fair to the new relationship? Maybe you can answer that, because I'm not sure I can.
I have the type of personality that actually puts in 110% of myself. I will bend over backwards to do what I can to help others. That's me and what makes me happy. I have been told I am a people pleaser and while that may be true to an extent, it's also true that doing for others makes me happy. The downside to that is it also makes me susceptible to be taken advantage of sometimes. This goes back to the selfishness of the world today. You have givers and you have takers. The givers give it their all and the takers drain them with no return. If the givers stop giving, they are not truly themselves doing what makes them happy and makes them who they are and will ultimately become part of the larger population of takers, those who are greedy, selfish, clueless. Instead of going over to the dark side to the world of takers, those that drain you of who you are we need to shift over to the world of givers, a world where we care about others enough to stop and help them when they are in need. Pay it forward whether we can afford it or not. Become a world that is generous, loving, caring, kind, considerate and lose the bitterness, resentment, hate, greed, and selfishness. We are all human and have our flaws. We all have our problems, We've all made mistakes. Be there for others. . .say a kind word. . .help your friend in need. This doesn't always relate to money, but time and attention. Be there and listen to them when they need to talk. Be their shoulder to cry on when they are down and out. Be by their side through their dark days and help lift their spirit. Walk with them, beside them, guiding them through their hard times so that they may find the light at the end of their tunnel. Have respect for their feelings and for them and don't take their kindness for granted. Don't be a taker, a drainer, but show them that you care enough to give in return on their bad days. Be a friend. . .a true friend. Be a true companion, a true significant other. Give them 110% as they are to you. Be their shoulder to lean on or their rock when they need it because even the happiest person you know, the most giving person you know is struggling with something inside.
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